Thursday, July 23, 2015

Thoughts on Weird Moles and Warriors

Deep breaths and deep knee bends were my father’s cure for sickness. What it really did was take your mind off your upset tummy and help you think about something else.  As a child I would be touching my toes in tears as my father would remind me to do just one more.  His knowing presence calmed me; that I would be okay as I exhaled.  Even if I had to lunge to the bathroom, eventually I would be okay, and this too would pass.

That morning, and the days before my appointment to see the specialist for the moles on my foot, I did a lot of deep breathing.  I cried a lot and I listened to music a lot more than I have in a while.  Worship before battle.  My mind was in a battle and I knew it.  I would join in with Kari Jobe's "Forever" as I washed dishes, clinging to the sink, knowing the Lamb has overcome.

In that particular worship session, God reminded me of a picture that I was familiar with.  This, interesting enough, would be my third time watching this same home movie.  It was a knight on a horse charging forth in battle.  I could see things being cut down like one would swipe the heads off dandelions with the fluff spraying around.  The path was straight and the knight determined.  I also knew there were others following after; almost tethered to the rider. Forward forward forward heaving with battle, and joy. The warrior finally removed its armour and to my amazement once again, it was me.


Andrew came with me to my appointment, which I appreciated so very much.  His presence was calming as we travelled up in the elevator and as we walked to doctor’s office.  It was surreal. 

The dermatologist was young; a young woman with a kind face.  She knew about my moles and we discussed why my doctor had sent me, and the reason for such alarm with the placement of these moles.  "Let's take a look" she said.  I didn't want a biopsy.  I wanted the news to be so dull that it wouldn't even be needed.  That is how I was praying, and I knew that is what others were praying as well.

“These look fine" as she put her fancy magnifying glass away.  I let out my breath and broke into tears. Thank you thank you thank you.  "We won't need to biopsy these." "Are you sure?" I stammered.  "Yup.  I am sure and I will tell you why."  The kind young doctor then informed us of the abcde of moles and importance of a yearly check-up because melanoma is on the rise.  I did my best to stay present but I was having trouble knowing that I had a new lease at life. 

Yes, this may sound drastic for some, but the journey of waiting, then going, and then hearing her say that it wasn't cancer!!!   That was such a battle for me.  All I can speak of is my journey through what I feared.  It sounds simple and probably trite but I found myself examining my life and stumbling forward.  Thank you for your prayers for my preparation for this journey of mine to this point.  I am certain there will be other roads of preparation for me, and my journey continues, bumps and dark corners and all.  Yet!  There are brilliant moments of beauty.  Deep breaths refocusing your vision and heart to what matters.  Jesus, there in those moments.  At times I did not see Him and I felt that I did not hear Him but I clung to the truth that He is with me always.

The Lamb has overcome.  If I had to have a biopsy, He has overcome.  If it went the way I feared, He has overcome.  Forever He is gloried.  Forever He is lifted high. Forever He is risen.  He is alive.

Thank you for your prayers from the bottom of my heart right down to my deep knee bends.

Joanne

Thursday, July 2, 2015

Rachel, Bruce, and Jimmy

You've heard about them.  Perhaps too much, and I should just leave it be.  But I will blame Jimmy Fallon.

I won’t call this a rant, and will try to keep it to an observation… an observation that was crystallized in a moment of Jimmy’s monologue on The Tonight Show.

We know the stories.  Bruce Jenner is going through the transition of becoming Caitlyn Jenner, and the media is celebrating his transgender process as courage and authenticity.

Rachel Dolezal, president of the NAACP in Spokane Washington, was found to be white, and not of mixed African American heritage, as she had led people to believe.  And the media is tearing her apart as a fraud.


In Journey Canada, we teach about the current popular mindset of Essentialism... that if you feel something, it is a part of your essence.   This mentality says that to be an authentic person, and true to your essence, you should act on those feelings.  If you feel attracted to the same gender, then that is who you are, you are gay, and you should act on those feelings.  If you feel you are the wrong gender, then you are, and you should change it.  It is even seen as a moral obligation, and if you do not act on those feelings, then you are not being true to who you really are.

This mindset is dangerous and precarious.  Feelings are fickle.  Feelings change.

The observation I want to make is an obvious one.  Why is Bruce Jenner championed as an icon for authenticity, while Rachel Dolezal is shamed as a charlatan?

As I said, I blame Jimmy Fallon for making me write about this.  Joanne and I thoroughly enjoy Jimmy, and one night, in his opening monologue, he made the following joke:

“Rachel Dolezal stepped down from her position as president of an NAACP chapter after it was revealed that she was a white woman pretending to be black. Now her brother says he knew about it but she asked him not to blow her cover. Unfortunately, her cover had already been blown by God when he made her a blond-haired, blue-eyed white lady.” – Jimmy Fallon

This is the obvious hypocrisy in the media and our current culture.  Didn't God make Bruce Jenner a boy?  But Jimmy would never dare to make a joke about that.

Bruce feels like a woman, so our culture thinks it is a part of his essence.  So he should act on altering that.  But Rachel feels black.  She has been referred to as “Transracial.”  One news site quoted her tweet:


She has a point.  Why is it okay for Bruce to feel like he has the wrong genitalia, and not okay for Rachel to feel like she has the wrong skin?

Culture points at her and laughs.  Look at her!  Ask her mother!  She’s white!  But I'm sure if we were to ask Bruce Jenner’s mother, she would say that she gave birth to a boy.

There has been much talk and writing about our culture and our view of sexuality and identity.  Some have said we are on a slippery slope.  Others have said that we have slid down the slope and made camp at the base of it.  I would have to say we are leaning toward the latter.

God help us all.